Mu rukundo no mu bashakanye, icyizere ni inkingi ya mwamba yubaka umubano. Ariko hari igihe ibintu bihinduka buhoro buhoro, umuntu akabona imyitwarire mishya atari asanzwe abona ku mugore we cyangwa umukobwa bakundana. Iyo impinduka zibayeho, hari abagabo bazirengagiza bakazifata nk’ibintu bisanzwe, nyamara hari ubwo zishobora kuba ibimenyetso by’ikibazo gikomeye mu mubano.
Iyi nkuru igamije kugufasha gusobanukirwa neza ibimenyetso 7 bikunze kugaragara ku mugore ushobora kuba yagize undi mugabo, ariko tunagaragaza ko ibi atari ibimenyetso byemeza 100%. Ni ibintu byo kwitondera no kuganiraho aho guhita ushinja cyangwa uca urubanza.
Reka dusobanure buri kimwe mu buryo burambuye.
1. Impinduka itunguranye mu mbaraga n’imyitwarire (Sudden Change in Energy)
Iyo umugore agarutse mu rugo cyangwa aho mubana afite imyitwarire itandukanye cyane n’iyo asanzwe afite, bishobora kugutera kwibaza.
Hari ubwo aza yishimye birenze urugero, afite akanyamuneza kadashingiye ku kintu runaka, cyangwa akaza acecetse cyane, asa n’uwari kure mu bitekerezo. Hari n’igihe aza asa n’uwakozweho “reset” – nk’aho yavuye ahandi akinjira mu mwanya mushya w’amarangamutima.
Impamvu ishobora kuba nyinshi: akazi kamugendekeye neza, amakuru meza yumvise, cyangwa umunaniro. Ariko iyo impinduka zibaye akamenyero kandi nta gisobanuro gihamye atanga, ni ngombwa kubiganiraho mu bwitonzi.
Impinduka z’amarangamutima zituruka ku guhangayika, kumva icyaha, cyangwa kugerageza guhisha ukuri, na zo zishobora kugaragarira muri iyo myitwarire mishya.
2. Guhita ajya koga cyangwa mu bwiherero akimara kugera mu rugo
Iyo umuntu ageze mu rugo agahita ajya mu bwiherero atabanje kugusuhuza, kukuganiriza cyangwa kukwereka ko yishimiye kukubona, bishobora kukubabaza cyangwa kukugira amatsiko.
Hari abagore bashobora kuba bakoze urugendo rurerure, babize icyuya cyangwa bashaka kwisanzura mbere yo kuganira. Ariko niba bihora bibaho kandi akirinda gukorwaho, kukwegereza cyangwa kukwegura kugeza amaze koga, bishobora gutuma wibaza.
Bamwe babikora bashaka gukuraho impumuro cyangwa ibimenyetso by’aho bavuye. Ariko si byiza guhita ubishyira ku rwego rwo kumushinja. Icy’ingenzi ni ukureba niba hari izindi mpinduka zibyunganira.
3. Impumuro idasanzwe ku mubiri (Unusual Body Scent)
Umuntu wese agira impumuro ye karemano. Iyo iyo mpumuro ihindutse bitunguranye, cyangwa akaza afite umubare munini wa parufe kurusha uko asanzwe ayikoresha, bishobora gutera kwibaza.
Hari ubwo ashobora kuba yahinduye parufe, yagerageje nshya, cyangwa yahuye n’ahantu hari impumuro ikomeye. Ariko niba impumuro isa n’aho igamije guhisha indi mpumuro, kandi bikabaho kenshi, bishobora kuba ikimenyetso cy’uko hari icyo agerageza guhisha.
Gusa wibuke ko impinduka nk’izo zishobora no guterwa n’impamvu zisanzwe nko guhindura ibikoresho by’isuku cyangwa parufe nshya.
4. Guhita arakara cyangwa akarakara birenze (Overly Defensive or Emotional)
Iyo umubajije ikibazo gisanzwe agahita arakara, akaguhindukira, cyangwa agatangira kukushinja ibindi bintu bidafitanye isano n’ikibazo wamubajije, bishobora kuba uburyo bwo kwirwanaho.
Hari igihe umuntu wumva afite icyaha cyangwa atishimiye ibyo yakoze, akoresha uburakari nk’ingabo. Ashobora gutangiza impaka zitari ngombwa, agashaka guhindura ingingo, cyangwa akagushinja ko ari wowe umukurikirana cyane.
Ariko na none, ibi bishobora guterwa n’umunaniro, stress, cyangwa ibibazo byo mu kazi. Ni yo mpamvu ari byiza kureba niba imyitwarire mishya ihora igaruka kandi ihuzwa n’ibindi bimenyetso.
5. Kwirinda kurebana mu maso no gukorwaho
Amaso ni indorerwamo y’umutima. Iyo umuntu atagishaka kukureba mu maso igihe muvugana, cyangwa akirinda kukwegereza no kuguhobera nk’uko byari bisanzwe, bishobora kukwereka ko hari icyahindutse.
Mu rukundo rusanzwe, gukorwaho, guhobera no gusomana ni ibimenyetso by’urukundo n’ubusabane. Iyo ibyo bigabanutse bitunguranye nta mpamvu ifatika ihari, bishobora kuba ikimenyetso cy’uko amarangamutima ye hari aho yahindukiye.
Ariko na none, hari igihe umuntu aba afite ibitekerezo byinshi, ibibazo by’umubiri cyangwa ibindi bibazo byihariye bituma atagaragaza urukundo nk’uko bisanzwe.
6. Imyambarire n’imisatsi bigaragaza ko byihuse (Clothes & Hair look Disturbed)
Iyo agarutse asa n’uwihuse, imisatsi idatunganye, maquillage yasibye igice, cyangwa imyenda isa n’iyambaye atitayeho, kandi akaguha ibisobanuro bidahuye n’uko asa, bishobora kukubera ikibazo.
Hari igihe ibintu nk’ibi biterwa n’akazi kenshi, imvura, cyangwa urugendo rutoroshye. Ariko niba ibisobanuro atanga bihora bidahuye n’ibigaragara, ni byiza kubitekerezaho no kubiganiraho mu bwitonzi.
7. Telefoni ihinduka ibanga rikomeye
Iyo telefoni ihindutse ibanga rikomeye, akayihisha, agasiba notifications, akayifunga ako kanya uje hafi, cyangwa ntakigere ayishyira kure ye, bishobora kuba ikimenyetso cy’uko hari ibyo atifuza ko ubona.
Muri iki gihe cya digital, telefoni ni ibanga rikomeye ku bantu benshi. Ariko iyo impinduka zibayeho mu buryo bukabije kandi butunguranye, bishobora kuba hari icyo agerageza guhisha.
Icy’ingenzi si ugukeka gusa, ahubwo ni ukureba niba hari izindi mpinduka zihurirana n’iyi.
Icyo Wakora Niba Ubonye 3 cyangwa Birenze Muri Ibi
Niba ubona byinshi muri ibi bimenyetso, ntuhite ushinja cyangwa ugafata icyemezo gikomeye. Ikintu cya mbere ni:
Kugumana umutuzo
Gukusanya amakuru atari mu gushinja
Gutegura ikiganiro gituje kandi cyubaka
Bwira mugenzi wawe uko wiyumva aho kumushinja. Urugero: “Ndabona hari impinduka mu myitwarire yawe, kandi biranteye impungenge. Hari icyo twaganiraho?”
Itumanaho rishingiye ku kuri no ku bwubahane ni ryo ryonyine ryubaka cyangwa risana umubano.
Umwanzuro
Ibimenyetso twavuze si urubanza. Si gihamya ko umuntu yakoze ubuhemu. Ariko ni ibimenyetso bishobora kukwereka ko hari ikibazo mu mubano wanyu – yaba ari ubuhemu, umunaniro, depression, cyangwa kutishimira uko mubanye.
Aho gushinja no gutandukana mu burakari, gerageza kubaka ibiganiro byimbitse, wumve mugenzi wawe, kandi mufatanye gushakira umubano wanyu umuti.
Urukundo rwubakwa n’icyizere, kandi icyizere cyubakwa n’ukuri no kuvugana.
